Aloha Josephine!

For one more time, Jo had us in sync and paddling in the same direction

By Ken Tingley

There in the official documentation was her final request stated in unemotional legalese of our society. She wanted her remains taken to Hawaii - the magical paradise whose people and history she admired - and her ashes spread amidst the peace and tranquility she found there. It seemed fitting and right and there was never a doubt those wishes would be fulfilled, even though it meant traveling halfway around the globe.

It is astounding the power your loved ones have even in death.

It was six months ago that Josephine left us suddenly and shocking leaving a hole in the lives of our shrinking family that cannot be repaired, especially for her little sister Gillian - my wife - who has struggled mightily.

Their relationship was deep and personal and I won’t even pretend to understand the depths of her loss. 

So that’s how the five of us found found ourselves knee-deep in the ocean water of Keauhou Bay Thursday morning all dressed smartly in matching blue flowered Hawaiian shirts that Jo certainly would have loved.  It occurred to me Jo was still there commanding us to learn and appreciate the Hawaiian culture and its people.

We were listening intently to the instruction of a remarkable group of people from the Keauhou Canoe Club after dragging the outrigger canoe into the warm ocean water.

Gillian (left) and Rosie prepare Josephine for her final voyage on Keauhou Bay.

Outriggers are side-by-side attached canoes. You need six paddlers in each and we quickly realized this was not a joy ride. We were part of the crew.

And that seemed like something Jo would have wanted, too.

All of us, pulling together in the same direction as a family.

I was sitting on the left side in the number three seat, Two seats behind me was Rosie, Jo’s lifelong friend who had come all the way from North Carolina and had awakened before sunrise in tears still mourning her friend.

Isabel, my son’s girlfriend, was in the number three seat of the canoe to my right and perhaps wondering what she had gotten herself into. My son Joseph was directly behind her in the number four seat and Gillian in the number five seat cradling Jo’s ashes in a simple Hawaiian jug.

We were soon in rhythm with our paddles, five, six, seven strokes, then the order to switch our paddles to the other side. The 12 of us in sync taking Josephine off to eternity.

It had poured that morning. I was later told an unprecedented three inches of rain had fallen overnight and closed the nearby golf course. But as we headed out to sea, the rain and subsided and it had brightened ever so slightly

When we got to the edge of the bay, we began paddling in a circle and each of us took turns emptying a colorful Hawaiian flowers into the ocean until they made a circle in the water. It was then Gillian fulfilled her sister’s request and slowly released the ashes into the clear ocean water.

All of us paddling. All part of the mission.

When the ashes had been released, we stopped and began the ceremony. We spoke the native Hawaiian words Jo embraced whenever she was here.

“Aloha Josephine” we all repeated at the end. “Aloha Josephine.”

We were each given a chance to share our thoughts about Jo as a person, about who she was and what she meant to us.

It was the final goodbye.

This was graveside unlike anything we had ever experienced.

We then sang a Hawaiian song with the words “aloha au ia oe.” It means “I love you” in Hawaiian.

There were smiles.

There were tears.

The five of us did not speak.

We were on a mission.

Afterward we picked up our paddles and resumed our duties and pointed the outrigger toward shore.

Members of the Keauhou Canoe Club helped us take Josephine on your final journey. They are special group of people.

Jo’s journey was complete, at least our part in it.

I’m sitting here now an hour before sunrise. It is midnight dark and just the occasional muffled sound of a distant wave crashing against the volcanic rock.

Only the tears are keeping me company.

There is the soft caress of a tropical breeze on my face and I’m not sure If there is any more peaceful place.

The words of the canoe club member returns to my thoughts.

Comforting words.

He told us as we sat quietly on the water that Josephine was not just here in Hawaii now, she was anywhere there is a ocean. Her spirit would now spread across the globe and that anytime we were near an ocean, she would be there with us.

I never thought about it that way before.

It was comforting.

Jo loved to travel and she left those plans retirement plans unfulfilled.

Her journey has begun.

Her spirit has been unleashed in the great beyond.

We were waving Aloha on Thursday.

We were wishing her well.

But it was hard not to feel the poorer for it.

Aloha Jo.